Anyway, here's my list of the 20 most evil Sue Sylvester Quotes:
20. "From Fort Wayne, Indiana, the not-at-all stupidly named, Aural Intensity!"
Episode 22: Journey
19. "So you like show tunes. It doesn't mean you're gay. It just means you're awful."
Episode 18: Laryngitis
18. "Your hair looks like a Briar patch, I keep expecting racist animated Disney characters to pop out of your hair and sing songs about living on the bayou."
Episode 22: Journey
17. "You don't deserve the power of Madonna. Simply put, you have all the sexuality of all those pandas down at the zoo who refuse to mate."
Episode 15: The Powers of Madonna
16. "That was the most offensive thing I've seen in twenty years of teaching. And that includes an elementary school production of Hair."
Episode 2: Showmance
15. "You know, the way you use your mental illness to help these kids is really inspiring. I'm shocked you're not married."
Episode 3: Acafellas
14. "All I want is just one day a year when I'm not visually assaulted by uglies and fatties. Seriously, Ohio, these retinas need a day off. So here's the dream, the Friday after Christmas, which I have off, if you're hideous stay at home. Spend the entire day watching home videos of a time when you weren't too repulsive for me to ever want to look at."
Episode 12: Mattress
13. "Oh, I will bring it, William. You know what else I'm gonna to bring? I'm gonna bring some Asian cookery to wipe your head with. Cause right now you've got enough product in your hair to season a wok. "
Episode 14: Hell-O
12. "Mercedes, your vocal chords have had more fantastic runs than a Kenyan track team."
Episode 16: Home
11. "KISS MY ASS JOSH GROBAN!"
Episode 22: Journey
10. "I'll need to see the set list for sectionals, after all. I want them on my desk warm from the laminator at 5pm. If it is one minute late, I will go to the animal shelter and get you a kitty cat. I will let you fall in love with that kitty cat. And then on some dark cold night I will steal away into your home and punch you in the face."
Episode 8: Mash Up
09. "When I heard he wanted to write himself in as Cleopatra, first I was aroused, then furious"
Episode 5: The Rhodes Not Taken
08. Glee club. Every time I try to destroy that clutch of scab-eating mouth breathers it only comes back stronger like some sexually ambiguous horror movie villain. Here I am, about to turn 30, and I've sacrificed everything only to be shanghaied by the bi-curious machinations of a kabal of doughy misshapen teens. Am I missing something, Journal? Is it me? Of course its not me. Its Will Scheuster. What is it about him, Journal? Is it the arrogant smirk? Is it the store-bought home perm? You know, Journal, I noticed something yesterday. Of course. Its coming clear to me now. If I cant destroy the club, I will have to destroy the man!
Episode 6: Vitamin D
07. "I can't stand the sight of kids getting emotional, unless it's from physical exhaustion."
Episode 7: Throwdown
06. "I may have to go out and buy you a tiny diaper because your chin looks like a baby's ass."
Episode 17: Bad Reputation
05. "I like minorities so much, I'm thinking of moving to California to become one."
Episode 7: Throwdown
04. "This is what we call a total disaster ladies. I'm going to ask you to smell your armpits. That's the smell of failure and it's stinking up my office."
Episode 3: Acafellas
03. "Look at me. Even in the heat of battle, I'm so elegant, regal. I am Ajax, mighty Greek warrior."
Episode 7: Throwdown
02. "Santana! Wheels! Gay kid! Asian! Other Asian! Aretha! Shaft!"
Episode 7: Throwdown
01. You think this is hard?
".. I'm living with hepatitis, that's hard!"
".. Try filling your own cavity, that's hard!"
".. Try being waterboarded, that's hard!"
".. Try removing your own appendix, that's hard!"
".. Try auditioning for Baywatch and being told they're going in another direction, that's hard!"
".. I'm passing a gallstone as we speak, that's hard!'
Episode: All season Long!!
5 comments:
Para sakin... all Sue quotes that ever existed are brilliant. She's probably the only antagonist that I will ever love.
I wonder why it's so funny yet in a very different level of fun. Haha. Sue is very intense, nakaka-miss tuloy.
Robbie, yes, all Sue quotes are note worthy. But more than the lines, I think Jane Lynche captures the "bully with a heart" thing so well. That we can even sympathize with her.
Pao, I think it's all in the writing of her lines. Maybe they want an antagonist that also has a heart and we'll eventually fall in love regardless how mean she gets. Haha. And yeah, I miss Sue and Glee. Sigh.
where is the line of "destination horror?" love that line.
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